Saturday, December 03, 2005

no no no no no no no

On Wednesday, I made it all the to my Doctors in Shepherds Bush for a 9am appointment to take out my stitches. The receptionist there absolutely strictly adheres to every single stereotype that you can think of. A complete hatchet faced bitch of the first degree.

“I’m here for a 9am appointment.” She looks at me in alarm even before checking the appointments. I mean how could it be that ANYONE could have an appointment? I am obviously stupid. She must watch Little Britain and more or less told me that the computer says no. I explain that it’s only to take out some stitches and maybe I’m supposed to see the Nurse.

Cue, the smell on her top lip getting worse. “You got a letter” and obviously expects me to just walk out in complete understanding. Turns out that the Nurse is off sick for a week.

Luckily I’ve encountered the receptionist before and taking a tip from Lyra, I just looked at her blankly and said “No”, not budging from my position.

“Where do you live?”

“SE24.”

“You can’t be a patient here.”

“Doctor M said I could.”

“Doctor M is no longer here.”

“Yes but he was Head of Surgery at the time, please ask the Doctor if he will see me.”

“Doctor says no”. She hands me a leaflet and tells me that I can go to Charing Cross Hospital or Parsons Green.

So, I limp to Charing Cross Drop In Centre and quickly notice the 2 hour waiting time sign. I tell reception the purpose of my visit. I spit blood when I’m told that they no longer remove stitches. I limp to Parsons Green, I wait for 45 minutes and it takes 45 seconds to remove my stitches.

I am changing Doctors!!!!

RIP George Best

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